I can't believe October is gone and now November - new month, my birthday month - is now here l, and equipped with its' own set of challenges and lessons to teach and stretch me with.
Carly Marie's Project Heal #CaptureYourGrief and #WhatHealsYou 31 Days of healing has been hard and also good for my heart and soul. I found this project a few days before October restarted through the #PAIL and #PAILawareness hashtags on Instagram. I found it so fitting and appropriate for me to be a part of as October was supposed to be such a big, life-changing month for Paul and I. Our baby, our first-born, our #theGaviniBabe was set to be born on Thursday, October 27th.
Going into my blog daily, writing about each day's theme and prompt, and taking the time out of the day to reflect and share what's weighing on my heart has been painful, but also healthy and oddly therapeutic for me. Paul had even DIY-ed me earlier last month a super, minimal desk in our bedroom for this purpose of blogging alone. On his own grieving journey, Paul has also been the absolute best on being there and present for me.
During this month, I've come across thousands of other angel parents, mamas in particular and have learned about their stories and have cried with them. I am in awe and amazed by the grieving and bereaved parents community. I am excited for the online, social media forums I get to be a part of, learn from, and grow with for the remainder of my life. I am eager and look forward to all the future Capture Your Grief's challenges, candle lighting services my husband and I will be holding, the many other PAIL remembrance months to come, and for all the new friendships still yet to happen.
Knowing that my husband and I are not in this alone in this walk and journey eases the crippling pain and ache of it all. Knowing that others are walking similar paths and seeing how God is very much still at work and seeing redemption and restoration through their stories gives me hope and a peace for my own -- whatever it may be and whatever it may hold.
I am thankful for the new community I am now a part of, all the new connections and friendships that have come from the cause + reason of this month, and for all the feedback and love I've received from those who've stopped by and taken the time to read my heart on this tiny space of the internet world. Now, it's time to reset, rest, pray hard, and prepare my heart for my birthday month and to try and swallow my 'usually' favorite time of the year without the biggest part of my life and who I am today. 💕
Thanks for reading.
Thamks for your love.
Thanks for wanting to read and learn more about Haven and our story.
It's meant so much to us both.
And thank you, to all the angel mamas for your love in a special, particular way.
We stand together and we can do this.
My heart to yours,